This isn't my usual snarky blog post. Today is a weird day for me and I've been doing a lot of reflecting that I'd like to share with you if you're someone who has gone no contact with members of their family. We're always told that family should come first, you don't give up on them, etc etc etc. But that's just not the reality for many of us. So here are some things you may need to hear:
- You can love someone with your whole heart and still recognize it's not healthy to have them in your life
- You are not being selfish by setting boundaries
- You cannot fix other people
- That bears repeating: YOU CANNOT FIX OTHER PEOPLE. In fact, you can't even motivate them to change. Not really. They need to come to that decision themselves and seek their own treatment.
- You are not responsible for the feelings of other people. If you've cut someone off, you've probably heard from either that person or others how sad they are. That's not your problem. Odds are, you tried to salvage the relationship and were met with resistance. You did your part. If they are sad, they can get treatment.
- It will hurt less as time goes on and you nurture the healthy relationships in your life. Lean on those who are truly there for you. Soon you'll go from surviving to thriving.
- You know what's best for you.
- Family is what you create, not to whom you're related
- You've got this