Photo: Flickr RF
This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed)
So, even though covid is spiraling out of control once more, Summer is coming and people are traveling. Even though they are going to popular destinations, they are definitely hitting up overrated places. When pressed for an example of an overrated place, Abe said Galenia. Apparently, all they have there is pawn shops, ornaments and milkshakes. I mean, he's never personally been there but that's what he's heard (I think, who knows with him.) Anyway, here's a list of the 5 most overrated places.
1. Disney (any and all of it.)
2. Leaning Tower of Pisa
3. Eiffel Tower
4. Times Square
5. The Louvre
Speaking of overrated, there's plenty of Chicago stuff that should be on that list and for that reason, we explored that today. Angi's pick could be controversial because she chose Bozo the Clown. She hates clowns with a passion and Abe was disgusted by her choice. He's the scariest of clowns and can be found hiding under sewer grates on Lower Wacker. Now Abe, a native son of Chicago, spoke for all of us when he came correct with deep dish pizza. It's great every once in a while but it is essentially tourist food. Everyone knows that tavern style is the perfect and proper way to eat Chicago pizza. To the phones, we started with Jackie who said Wrigley Field is super overrated. It's super outdated (and not in a fun way) and the bathrooms are disgusting. Anne picked the Mag Mile which was an odd choice to Angi & Abe who both like it. Her choice is based on the overpriced stores that don't sell realistic items. Patrick said Michael Jordan's Steakhouse is bad when it comes to steaks but Abe swears by their burgers and drinks. Rich picked Millenium Park, Frank said Portillo's, Terry said The White Sox, Head Roadie Jim said Navy Pier. Though we couldn't get to everyone, it should be noted that a ton of calls said The Mag Mile. If you are looking for more roadie comments or have your own, hit up our socials (FB group, Twitter, Instagram) and read up or drop us a comment.
Other Stuff from Today's Show:
Oh glorious 5 A.M. hodgepod, welcome in and glad to see you on this shortened work week. As you know (and probably complained about,) this week barely started yesterday for us and it is almost done. Between Angi's Denmark adventure and Abe willy wanking in his Impala, yesterday more than made up for us being gone. With that said, the discussion about the shortened work week became the standing point that fired us up to start this morning. The general belief is that happiness comes in the form of a 4 day work week and so Angi and Abe discussed which would be the best day off to bookend the shortened week (that we'll never get.) Abe started off by suggesting Monday was the day that deserves the chop (which I don't agree with because then it spirals Tuesday into the worst day and Tuesday is Gay Tuesday so that's a no from me dawg.) Angi smartily chose Friday as the day to be off. As a younger person (we're all old as dirt,) Thursday was the hot party night that you always wanted to go out on. Back then, Thursday nights had it all. There were dollar drinks, quarter beers, the sense of Friday looming and you could then still go out for three more days. Funny enough, noted square Abe used to love to go out on Thursday nights (and probably play bingo or something.) Of course, when something nice happens, Angi has to find some way to ruin it. Angi recalled when she was a bartender and how much she hated quarter beers because guys would buy two dollars in beer and then never tip. After that faceplant in memory lane, we went back to the present to discuss what is occurring in the building today. Apparently Abe is disgusted because there is a "Happy Hour" being done in the building today which means there are tons of jobbers in the building. Angi finds this odd because Abe is essentially the godfather and most of these people will spend their time there kissing the ring. Everyone wants a piece of the Abe Kanan empire because his sway can make things happen. Well, everyone aside from the supposed roadie who complained yesterday that Angi and Abe don't do a live 5 hour show. Funny enough, they're there at 5, I'm here at 5 and we go every day (when Angi isn't in Denmark) until 10 so this guy is clearly an idiot.
Anyone who is a long term listener of this show knows that we tend to love a great drunk, poop or sexy story. Replacing our drunk ninja is a dirty pooper who lost her proverbial ish inside of a beauty supply store recently. This massive pile was so big that she literally ended up destroying 8 wigs in the process, the poop just getting all over them. Abe was befuddled by why the wigs were on the floor for the poop to infiltrate them but Angi elaborated that she may have gone on a spraying spree, so to speak. Abe came to realize that there is no way a wig can return from this unsettling situation so the total loss here is immense. Luckily there was video of it but the police were smart enough to realize that this is not something safe for human consumption and did not release it to the public. The main takeaway though came from Abe who believes it's okay to poop on the floor in certain situations. For example, if a public bathroom won't allow you to use their bathroom, then it's okay to go on the floor. According to Abe, if they tell you that the bathroom is out of order, they are liars. Public bathrooms are never out of order and to showcase this, Abe told a story about his experience. He was at an AT&T store buying his new iPhone and it had taken hours. He needed to use the bathroom because Abe's body is a ticking time bomb. He asked one associate who said it was fine to use but then another ran over and said "nope, out of order." See the point here is that laziness is probably the main culprit and cause of why the bathrooms mysteriously don't work. To cap this off, Abe explained that he would go to a firehouse to poop because he is confident every public place would let him in. For the record, Angi would love to see this (and would probably pay to see it.)
Finally, there is a "Happy Hour" event occurring today here at iHeart Chicago. That's right, a fun time to let go and just really live in the moment and enjoy time with your co-workers. Funny enough, even though it seems like no one works in the building (they don't) when free food and drinks come up, the place explodes. Like everyone shows up and the building is packed to the brim with people who suddenly remember they work there. Though Angi will be busy getting her grays lined up, Abe is over the moon to meet new people (like a puppy almost.) Angi, on the other hand, is an interrogator when it comes to new people. She sees someone on the elevator and she's all up in their business. Funny enough, when she does this no one seems to know who she is (because you know, they never come to work.) To remedy this, they suggested that there be two types of parties. The first would be for those who actually come to work so you would have a two person party that gets to go somewhere nice. As for those that only show up for events and occasions, jobbers who only come in when there's something good going on, they get relegated to TGI Friday's.
Request Wars 2.0:
Champion: Angi (Streak: 4)
Angi's (repping Chad) Song Choice: "You Could Be Mine" by Guns N' Roses
Abe's (repping Gwen) Song Choice: "Round and Round" by Ratt
Observation:
This is a big day, a huge day, a momentous day. Today could possibly be the day that Angi will take her 100th win. If she is anything like Abe, that means we'll never hear the end of it forever. In order to put this to an end, Abe brought out "horrible waitress" Gwen to try and gain sympathy from the lack of tipping nonsense. Song wise, Angi should easily have this.
Winner: Angi
10 O'Clock Toast:
Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey. They are back and no longer nailing bears feet to the pedal to make them bike around. Angi is thrilled as long as there's no clowns.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
"I don't care about Kansas, they don't deserve to see anything." - Abe
PSA's:
PSAbe & Angi: Hey, don't let Ozzy drive in a Lyft.
PSAbe: No masseuse should ever leave in tears after giving you a massage.
PSAbe: Hey, when I get a massage, no one cries.