This is a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting and funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast version of the show. If you want a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.
Call in Point:
(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)
Speaking of the weekend, Angi went out to dinner last night so you just know a story is coming. She happened to be in Abe's neighborhood and he pulled one of my favorite moves ever when she mentioned this. He asked why he wasn't invited (since she was in the area.) Angi explained that he wouldn't have gone even if he was invited anyway. Personally, I love to grief about not being invited to something and then when it does come up, I explain I had no intention of going as is. For Angi though, this night out was not all that Abe made it sound like it was supposed to be. After all, it was a Sunday night and Angi was in wind down mode (which I'm assuming means she was drunk for two days straight and needed to sleep off the hangover for Monday morning's show.) Anyway, while there Angi got triggered because that seems to be the central theme of the show this morning. So before getting to her story, she had to know what is something that bugs you about eating out. Her issue that arose last night was heat based but in the sense of it affecting the drinks on the table. The place she's at was a rooftop and in the evening, it was still kind of warm out and on the wood table, the drinks began to sweat. When she asked if she could have a napkin to deal with all the condensation, she was told they don't offer them because they blow off the rooftop. They did give out those non absorbent napkins which just meant it was pushing the water around. The table was an absolute mess, to the point that a squeegee should have been offered. Frustrated, Angi considered just taking off her shirt and using it as a towel but I'm sure no one there wanted to see her frakentits. Included in her rant was also asking for your check and it takes your server an hour to finally circle back around and bring it to you. Whenever Abe pays for a meal, he makes sure to just fork over his credit card at the same time just to not have to deal with waiting. Abe's pet peeve involves when he goes to Subway and they give him one napkin for his disgusting, mayo dripping sandwich. He clearly needs 70 and anyone with half a brain should recognize that. Roadie Bill called in to say his annoyance comes in the form of the person sitting across from you who has to be extra loud on their cell phone. There was a point made of asking how this is different than being loud when talking to the person at the table with you? When they're on the phone, people tend to yell, then they put their calls on speaker and don't even get started about Facetiming at the table. Rami is disgusted by the thought of old rags being used to wipe down the table which ends up leaving them gross and sticky. As Abe so expertly explained, they use those rags to clean up blood and puke so it makes sense why things remain dirty. Ashley used to work as a server and so this rang true for her but also bothered her. When the server forgets to bring part of your order and then blames it on the kitchen slacking. Knowing that he had an opportunity to have a burning question answered, Abe was curious about sauces. You see, when he goes out he asks for tons which in turn, embarasses his brother Sam. Abe doesn't see the issue, he's a good tipper after all so cover him in that sauce. Ashley the Server said you shouldn't but Angi thinks it's okay. She explained that she used to freak out all the time when she served because she would panic after remembering how she forgot to give extra sauce to people who asked. Head Roadie Jim's bother comes from servers asking if everything is okay when you're in the middle of eating. Clearly things are fine, calm down.
All the Rest:
It's Monday morning which means we're recapping things that happened this past weekend. Obviously, the story worth going over is the hurricane that tore up New Orleans from the floor up yesterday. Now, this was a tragedy and all but let's face it, I'm only going into this because you know one of these two said something ridiculous. Take a moment to lock in your guess before I tell you who said the stuff that made me go ... "yep, that was said." So even though Abe feels bad for New Orleans as they were wrecked by an almost category 5 and have no power, he absolutely does not want to live there. Mainly due to hurricanes, he also lumped in Florida for the same reason as well (plus the whole covid mess down there. Mind you, we're overlooking when he lived in Florida.) His suggestion, completely evacuate Louisiana and while you're at it, Alabama too. Ship them all off to Idaho or North Dakota. Mind you, this would more than likely cause a culture shock but for someone like Abe, he's not moving as is so it doesn't matter. He is firmly planted in Chicago and he doesn't want to move but at the same time, he's also thankful for Chicago. You see, people are terrified of the idea of the winters here and it keeps people from coming in and depleting our resources. We should be thankful for the bad weather and all that it does in keeping people from coming here and draining us. Remember all of this stuff btw when you start to complain that it's snowing 24 inches because it could be worse. You could have hurricanes, no power, no water and be living on a literal plane that is going to be underwater sooner rather than later. In that vein, something that is probably occurring right now (or basically when any massive tragedy occurs) is that the trolls are out in full force. Go to the comment section of Facebook (for the sake of not vomiting this early, don't,) Twitter or Reddit and you will see these keyboard warriors running their mouths. The perceived notion is that these losers are only nasty on the internet because they can be anonymous. The sad reality that's finally being reported is that these people are actually jerks in real life as well. Abe also had a lot to say about this particular subject. He wants these people to stop being bitches and stop posting on Facebook while they're at it. If you see someone post something and you find yourself shocked because they are like a toxic skinhead, you now know who they are so act accordingly. What gets Abe angry is people's inability to not attempt to turn all his posts into something political. He's making an observation or joke and some people feel the need to spin it and feed their agenda, like it matters or he cares. Abe is no about that life, he just wants to make random points without it derailing into a stupid mess. Angi agrees that everyone needs to just chill out and have a life, stop being irrationally angry all the time. The problem is people love to be offended at all times. There's this ingrained idea that if they don't comment for a week or so, the world will stop and their stupid opinion won't change it for the better. Basically, most people suck and honestly, none of us who are remotely rational just do not care. So if you wanna dump on people about the hurricane, maybe just keep it to yourself because no one needs that negativity.
Summer is coming to a close which also means that peak wedding season is also winding down. With that though means that a question had to be asked after a story came out this weekend about a married couple. This is a question of whether what they did was tacky or fair. So this couple from Chicago named Doug and Deidra had a destination wedding. Sidenote: destination wedding in my mind just says that you're a complete a-hole and if you get upset over people not going, you're a douche. Anyway, a couple they invited to the wedding who RSVP'ed yes ended up not showing. Annoyed and feeling spiteful, they sent them a bill for $240 for the reserved spot at the wedding they didn't fill. Some people seem to think they were fair or just in doing this while others seem to find it absolutely petty. The thing that needs to be taken into consideration when configuring where you fall on the spectrum is that this was done out of spite and not over concern about wasted money. Abe agrees with my thought process in that destination weddings are disrespectful. The counter thought was if you don't bother showing up though, that's more disrespectful. You should let them know that you can't come, be it via text or email. In Abe's mind (I adore this man,) he believes that at least 30 people do not show up at every wedding. Angi countered that at her wedding, she only had one no show couple. For her though, she had an open bar so in her mind, she already paid and she wanted people to drink the house down. Abe said that if a person she paid for as is calls to let you know they can't make it, then it's okay. Clearly not because the money was already wasted. The observation and decision here was that they were being petty in demanding the cash but as always, this was not the end of the discussion. Abe explained that if you do decide to have a destination wedding, don't invite anybody. You are forcing a vacation on all of these people and some do not want that or don't have the free time to take your forced vacation. It doesn't matter if you're a family member or a good friend, if you can't make it, you can't make it. You have all the right to say no and be okay with your decision. Angi explained that in the technical sense, her wedding to Jay the Straight was a destination wedding. After all, all of their family lives out of state and had to come in for the ceremony. There were some people who didn't want to make the distance trip and the added stipulation of no kids became even more of an issue. They sought to have a fun weekend with family and friends and did not want distractions based around children (who clearly ruin everything.) When kids get involved, the wedding turns into a distraction and don't get them started about kids being sloppy on the dance floor (that's what happens when they can't handle their liquor, duh.) Of course, there's those who say no kids and suddenly you arrive and there's 30 children there because people obviously don't care about intentions. To wrap this up, every person has a right to skip out on a wedding and if they try to charge you, tell them to go fug themselves.
Finally, as demonstrated on this show countless times, it does not take a lot for people to get angry. Like there is a literal trigger that sets everyone off for every little thing. Angi gave a list of examples of things that annoy people (which makes sense because she's always annoyed.) Talking on the phone while in a public place or talking out loud. Walking next to each other on the sidewalk. Like you don't need to be holding hands and walk down the street together in a long chain. Next up, leaving shopping carts in the parking lot and then all the spots are taken up by the wayward carts. My personal favorite on this list and or one of the biggest ones that exist in this day and age. People who use "freedom of speech" for them to act like a total a-hole. What else, how about people who throw bags full of garbage out of their car windows. What about people who are in a rush to get off an elevator or a bus. For men (because this has never happened to Angi,) when you're driving and scumbags stare you down at lights. After really discussing it, Abe pointed out that he would love to see their asses get kicked. As for Angi, she hates noises like the crunching of water bottles (Abe made sure to crush one in the studio to make her nuts.) Add on those people who chew super loud and you're really grinding her gears. Oh man, I sure hope that you don't get off an escalator and stop right there, causing people to crash into you. This will send her over the edge and she will just explode. As for Abe, he also can't stand people who drive with their feet hanging out the window of their car and barefoot. Given that she was already triggered, Angi came up with yet another issue in those people who are walking toward you but staring down at their phone. They of course will then look up two seconds before they bump into and get all angry that you almost crashed into them even though it's their fault. Roadie Dawn complained about people who ride motorcycles and they have their music on super loud. This is only acceptable if you're listening to Rock 95.5 however. If you are though, you'd better not have a loud engine that you're revving up just to show off and try to invoke a race because you're going to be murdered by our beloved hosts.
Request Wars 2.0:
Champion: Abe (Streak: 1)
Angi's (repping Kayla) Song Choice: "B.Y.O.B."
Abe's (repping Ned) Song Choice: "Drag the Waters"
Observation: Abe's player is a family man, Angi's is down helping the people of New Orleans by dragging the waters ... oh wait. These two will say anything to get a win but at least Angi's was timely.
Winner: Angi
10 o' Clock Toast:
Potatoes. After I told a story off air about idiots I know, Angi felt compelled to tell girls (via Urban Dictionary) and morons (via me and Liam Gallagher) that they are amazing.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
Quote: "Stop being a little bitch on the internet." - Abe
Quote: "What's up with 2021 and people who buy porn?" - Abe
Quote: "Don't leave your porn out around me." - Angi
Duo Quote:
"What did I tell you on Friday?" - Abe
"I don't remember what you told me 5 seconds ago." - Angi