I am pumped this morning, I've got my Dunkin' coffee, I might just chug some Jack and maybe I'll break out my delicious ham and tear it up with a chainsaw. That's right, it's Chainsaw Friday!
Current WWE Champion Drew McIntyre checked ahead of his brand champ vs brand champ this Sunday atSurvivor Series. The first thing that must be noted is Angi loved his Scottish accent and then proceeded to ask if he wears the belt around everywhere he goes. Since this is his second time holding the title, successfully won again this past Monday onMonday Night RAW, he explained that his wife was against him wearing it to bed. Of course, things couldn't stay on a normal course for long and that led to Abe asking if having his balls being slapped by Orton while in a pin was a simple ribbing or something else. Tack on Angi who then asked how long his kilt needed to be to cover his Scottish eggs. Also, do the swords and claymores mirror his junk? Pulling back to a moment of normalcy and less thirst, Drew went on to explain that he wants to be champ at Wrestlemania this year so he can hopefully get a proper main event in front of people as opposed to this year's win in a near empty performance center. Then, to really make the conversation go off the rails, I checked in to give a nice abridged history of my fandom before calling Drew a furry drink of water. Before closing, we did discover that his favorite wrestler is Bret Hart. Aside from this being the thirstiest interview he's probably ever done, I must say he was a really nice guy and I'm rooting for him to win his match on Sunday.
It's Friday, you know what that means, it's time for the Best Bet of the Week. Take that $1,000 you were going to use for a Cameo from The Undertaker, return all the gifts you got at your fake graduation wedding party, sell your Thanksgiving ham and take all that paper and bet on the Green Bay Packers +1 1/2 against the Indianapolis Colts. Abe is apparently the greatest football handicapper ever and if you trust the process and don't mind potentially losing all your cool stuff that you turned into cold hard silver dollars, run out to your nearest bookie who has yet to close down due to covid restrictions and place your bets! If you win, feel free to let us know on social media how well you did. If the bet goes sour, well...uhh, there's always next week.
So, what happens when you're stuck with your beloved sexy vivacious amazing wife in quarantine for 9 (10, 11, 20, 45) months. If you're noted show husband Jay the Straight, you start watching a lot ofDatelineand all those murder shows on like A&E and the such. Let's just assume that he's just bored and he wants something new to spice up his time stuck indoors. I'm sure it has nothing to do with murdering Angi, probably.... Anyway, this is an interesting question. If you could get away with a crime, what would you do? Well, if Abe could get away with something, he would rob a total scumbag. Boring answer imo, as Angi spiced it up and turned up the notch, saying that she would rob a bank. As for me, well let's just say I would probably end up stealing a certain Scottsman's kilt....
So, since today's show was so thirsty for the most part, between the interview and the sexy planned murder, it's only fitting Abe gets in on the action. His contribution, he wants to follow this girl who has a thick fat ass hanging out of a school girl outfit on Instagram. Sure, a hot girl makes sense as a good follow. However, the real reason Abe wants in on this hot mess is because his boy the pope liked that particular picture. That's right, the pope is just as thirsty as the rest of us, maybe. For Abe's sake, this is his favorite pope after all. For example, he's totally cool with gay marriage and of course, he loves that ass. You can go see the pic for yourself here on the site, the one you're reading this note on that Angi could next get right the entire duration of this story.
So, what would it take to get into Elvis' pants? I'm assuming not much at this point as he's been dead for some time and is probably nothing more than a skeleton now. However, these are not the pants he was wearing in his coffin. In fact, these were probably pants he wore out like once but that's irrelevant in this matter. A pair of stamp and note inserted pants that once belonged to Elvis are up for auction. Angi suggested that this was obviously the best gift Abe could get for his mother. Of course, this in turn detoured into aPawn Starsdiscussion where the pair decided if the pants would and could be sold on the show or not. Once that matter was put to rest, Abe offered his decision. He would not be purchasing these pants with his Best Bet of the Week winnings after all.
So, in a first, today's round of Anonymous Caller wasn't really all that Anonymous. Pat called in to confess that he works overtime because his kids drive him nuts. Assuming that being home with little ones is always going to be taxing, it would make sense however these kids are 14 and 16. That right teenagers, who seem to only fight and throw tantrums. This isn't supposed to be funny, this guy just hates his kids. So for his troubles, Pat got a ham that should make Thanksgiving after this being made public on the radio easier to swallow.
Lasty, it's Eggplant Friday! Well, I mean for me at least as I try in vain to get the beloved hashtag back. Until then, decisions about junk must remain discussed but not seen. So, it turns out that guys with small junk make more money than those guys with huge junk. The assumption on Abe's part is that guys with small junk just work harder and that guys with big junk are just running around spreading their seed everywhere. With this out there, Abe asked Angi a qwerstion. Would she rather have a mansion, Porsche and a dude with small junk as a partner or live in a tent but be with a guy with big junk. Being the smart one on the show, she chose the mansion obviously. Undeterred, Abe upped the ante. A partner with a mansion, Porsche and small junk or a studio apartment shared with a guy with huge junk. Angi has had her share of iving in studio apartments and as she discovered on the sex toy network yesterday (throwback,) there are more than enough toys to satisfy her needs.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
Quote: "Everybody, for some reason, thinks I'm Puerto Rican" - Angi
Tidbit: Abe has called kids as Santa
Quote: "Most sports handicappers, who do this for a living, don't even come close to my statistics" - Abe
Quote: "I'm a mix of things but I have no culture" - Abe
Quote: "Btw, every cult ends up with you banging the leader" - Abe