It's a bit chilly this morning which means, pandemic be damned, winter is officially on its way and with that, the triple holiday blitz of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years will make its impact felt. That said, since Thanksgiving is becoming an afterthought, let's look forward to the next holiday.
Do you buy yourself Christmas presents? Angi sure doesn't but she does buy herself a birthday gift. That said, here's a list of the Top 10 Presents people are buying for themselves.
10. Alcohol (why wait imo, buy it weekly)
9. Makeup
8. Shoes
7. Books
6. Chocolate
5. Laptops
4. Video Game Consoles (this should be number 1 imo.)
3. Cell Phones
2. Perfume/Cologne
1. Clothes
Further prying by Angi unveiled a few other gems to go with this. After asking Abe what he wants for Christmas, he mentioned world peace. What he actually meant was a PS5 (don't we all.) So, Angi has a goal, get Abe a PS5 for Christmas. Are you someone with a hookup, hit Angi on her socials or call in and let us know.
Skipping right to Christmas doesn't seem right though and let's face it, Thanksgiving is all about the food. So, in the spirit of that upcoming holiday, Angi explored some of the most popular fast foods by state. Here in Illinois, we love Chuck E Cheese apparently. I personally am flabbergasted by this as I haven't set foot in one in almost thirty years and the only time I hear it mentioned is when fights break out there. Even Abe had to wonder what exactly they are known for, beside their pizza. Neighboring Indiana likes Blimpie, which warranted Abe to want to take a trip with Angi to get some from there. In Wisconsin, they love Culver's (imo disgusting) butter burgers. Iowa oddly loves In-N-Out, which they apparently might not even have but apparently dream of eating anyway.
Finally, "Elmo" called in for today's go round of anonamoyous confessions with a secret so revolting, I almost threw up. Seriously, this is absolutely gross. So, last week, "Elmo" apparently ate a half a can of week old tuna that he found under the sink. I just can't even with this one, I literally gagged hearing this on the radio. For his story and apparently need to eat, "Elmo" was given a free ham.
Other Topics:
People's Sexiest Man Alive, the annual issue that promotes body positivity and showcases good dee...okay, what I meant was the issue that showcases a hot dude without a shirt on is getting ready for its release. The clear frontrunner this year is Jason Momoa because he's jacked, stacked and nice to look at. However, a rebellion is brewing finally, people are tired of what is considered an ideal hot dude and they want something different. That's why there is currently a petition (yeah, cause those work so well,) for Dr. Fauci to bePeople's Sexiest Man. Abe doesn't agree with this though, his pick is the beloved and missed Alex Trebek. It's pretty nice to see Abe pass along the torch, seeing as he won the award four years in a row according to resident Alzheimer's patient Angi.
So, would you consider becoming a volunteer to get inside a human petri dish of disease and disgusting behaviors? If this sounds appealing to you, Royal Carribean is looking to test out a post covid cruise. In case you forgot, people were trapped at sea and dying from covid and the like on those ships when the outbreak first began, so you know, this sounds delightful. That said, Abe broke out his beloved Matthew McConaughey "no, no, no, no" clip to promote his feelings on the idea and Angi explained that she went on a cruise once and was sea sick the whole time. Abe did chime in though that he would take a cruise however if it was the KISS farewell one.
Today we also learned that currently homebound Angi loves some HGTV (personal addition, so do I.) Abe agrees, stating his favorite show isMy Lottery Dream Homewhich led to a discussion on the annoyance of both hosts at the idea of how little these Lotto winners are willing to spend on their supposed dream home. Anyway, all this was brought on by a story about the star of the showGood Bones, who had a bandit that broke into her house, stole her stuff and then proceeded to poop in her garage. Yeah, nothing more to add on this one.
Lastly, beloved country icon Dolly Parton has made a point that she wants to doPlayboy. She had been on the cover before but she feels compelled to finally get the legendary girls out for a shoot. This led to Abe wondering if the bodega downstairs soldPlayboystill, mainly because they sell everything else, especially condoms. Angi wondered if there was any older woman that Abe would want to see inPlayboy, like Martha Stewart or Jane Fonda. Abe's first thought was that all the older women he would want to see are probably dead. He then decided on JLo as his older woman choice, which of course, enraged Angi. Oh Abe, you're such a pleaser.
Show Quotes and Tidbits:
"Is that why she looks like a triangle at the bottom of her chin?" - Abe
"I never wanna see Nick Foles in a Bears uniform ever again." - Abe
PSAbe: It's time to put the all time hit king Pete Rose in the Hall of Fame.
"Can't we take back the name Karen and switch it to Janet?" - Abe