Angi Wants to Stake Out a Men's Room - ATS - 9.27.24

Photo: JodiJacobson / iStock / Getty Images

This is just a small taste of the show overall, the bits and bobs that I found interesting, funny, insightful and relevant. To hear everything that happened, check out the podcast of today's show. However, if you're looking for a quick read along with random self inserts and my personal thoughts, you've come to the right place.

Call in Opening Point:

(This is the broadstroke canvas on which I base my call, obviously these notes are going to be longer and more detailed.)

Oh hell yes, it is Friday once again and we slide into the last weekend of September. Wait, hold on, we're bored of the Diddy stuff (sorry Malek) so instead of baby oil sliding we are blowing into the weekend with wild winds today as Heline seeks to hook up with another storm front to create a mega typhoon or something. However, the wild weather is the least of our concerns on Chainsaw Friday! as Marris witnessed something this morning that has only been seen by a select few. The Chicago white whale that he rolled up on is stuff of myths and it surely means he will probably be whacked for it but it was interesting to discuss. As he drove in this morning at 4 A.M. to start his first of eighteen jobs, Marris saw graffiti artists tagging on the interstate in real time. There was none of the Cirque Du Soleli dangling going on unfortunately and a stolen cherry picker was not in use, this was just a bunch of hoodlums on the ground. I'm assuming this came up because Angi was jealous since she has never seen it and with the crazy hours she has kept for years now, she always assumed she would stumble onto it. All of this "fun" only led the pair to being stuck with more questions and me to wonder if anyone on the crew is going to start carrying a harpoon gun on the way to work to spear these so-called "white whales" the next time they happen upon seeing them. After all, nothing has ever gone wrong when a weapon was brought into the iHeart studios yet....

Call in Main Point:

Now, if you've ever listened to this show regularly (sorry if that is the case, this is brain rot in pure audio form,) then you would know we love a bit of bathroom talk. This morning, Angi had a bathroom etiquette question which was more about public bathroom rules. New rule: you should never peek under a door and look for feet apparently. Instead, the proper etiquette is to knock politely and ask if anyone is in there. Interestingly enough, our beloved morning duo are not peekers but have their own way of going about figuring out if someone is behind the door crying at work or in a CVS. Marris is a knock and push kind of guy. However, this is not going to work if he's trying to barge in on Angi who if someone knocks on her door, she will start screaming "someone's in here!!!" (and she's elderly so don't startle her or her ticker might give out.) Marris actually found himself in a situation when he was on a layover during his trip where every stall seemed filled as he tried to kick in every single door. He was not there for people to be on their phones playing Angry Birds (what year is this?) and placing bets on DraftKings (foreshadowing kids.) If Angi is knocking, that means she is rushing so you best toss your phone in your purse and get out. Marris finished up his layover story by explaining that some of the stall doors were broken and made it look occupied when they were actually not and he only discovered this when the attendant stopped in. Angi then added she once pushed a door open that someone forgot to lock and low and behold, someone was in there and freaked out (as expected.) Back to the etiquette portion of this nonsense though, the next thing not to do was don't peek through the cracks. This is terrifying to Marris and he had to ponder why we make them so big in America (insert so many jokes here.) Marris said that stalls in other countries have seals to cover up these massive gaps in privacy and Angi had her own horror story of peeping. She once was in a jumpsuit which meant the whole thing had to come off to go to the bathroom. When finished, she saw there was no toilet paper and she used the hole between the two stalls to see if the other was occupied and to her it felt like gawking to look. There clearly needs to be bigger levels of privacy in these bathrooms but you know, we have other things to worry about in America. Rounding off the rules were don't make small talk with strangers, don't use the urinal next to someone if all the others are open (unless of course you're planning on critiquing junk which fits with Angi asking how Marris takes his out when using a urinal) and lastly, please flush the toilet if you use it. In fact, if you go number 2, give it a courtesy flush and then make sure the leftover is also sent away. We capped this with Marris telling us that some people don't know how to use a bidet evidenced by the floor being soaked around the toilet (it's not for washing the floor people!)

Other Stuff from Today's Show

What's this, an absolutely rare Daily Discussion Topic on a Friday, how wild. This was brought on by Angi needing help from the roadies because a friend who is Angi's age (107) texted her yesterday on his Jitterbug to ask her for some music recommendations. It seems that this dude was always into hip hop but now he's going through a midlife metal crisis and needs recommendations. He has currently been digging into Pantera's Vulgar Display of Power and was initially inspired by a Megadeth song. Whereas we here at a music station know it is always a good time to expand your musical horizons, Angi could basically only offer up her top 5 Metallica as suggestions. Marris threw in Linkin Park's Hybrid Theory into Meteora as a great one-two punch. Even though that is technically nü-metal, it fits the concept. As for myself, I'm going to say Greatest Hits by Iron Maiden as it gives enough of a fill of all their really good stuff that gives him a sound impression to dig further. Still, we needed more so we took to the Request Line and started with Alex who said he needs to hear Megadeth's So Far, So Good... So What! album. Head Roadie Bob said Metal Church's album The Dark is a must. Mike pulled out the classic Tool Ænima album. Josh clearly wasn't listening and offered Metallica's Black album. Brian said System of a Down's Toxicity is needed. Sam threw in Disturbed's 10,000 Fists. Steven capped us with Testament's The New Order. If you are looking for more roadie thoughts or have your own, hit up our Facebook group (Angi Taylor Show) and drop us a comment.

While Angi's floppy naturals will be flying out in the wild today, so will Marris' business as Angi got on the show this morning to discuss his plans for tomorrow. He is going on a (not a date) date with a girl to see an orchestra play at a theater along with Across the Spiderverse. Angi, of course, couldn't contain her giggling during this because she found the whole thing to be adorable and so she had some questions. First off, she wanted to know if Marris and the girl were going to dress up as Spider-Man and Mary Jane and do an upside down kiss after? Unfortunately, Marris will only be dressed up in a Venom shirt and he will not be wearing a blazer over it because as he pointed out to Angi (who was on planet Angi at this point) that it's not an actual orchestra. While Angi sang the Spider-Man theme song, Marris lamented how she had learned just enough comic nerd stuff to be an antagonist but not knowledgeable at all. Angi rebuttaled that she knows Spider-Woman, Spider Pig and Spider Hoe though and then went back in on Marris' attire. Apparently, an orchestra means fancy ball gowns and especially on a date (which Marris again pointed out it is not a date.) Angi then pondered if Marris would be cutting a hole in his $45 popcorn bucket while he talked pounding straight whiskey. All she wants though is the Spider-Man soundtrack playing while they bang because again, she thinks this is a date. The belief in all of this stems from Angi thinking Marris is lowkey dating this girl and won't tell her about that or a marriage because the last time Angi got involved in Marris' dating life, it did not go well (insanely comically bad.) Either way, Marris is annoyed and Angi can't wait for Marris to have Spider Babies and live in a web.

Finally, Angi is clearly trouncing Marris in fantasy and it's so ridiculous that other people are now talking smack to him about it. Even WGCI's Zac, who was awful last year, won one game and is just crapping on Marris. Still though the season is young and even though the Bears are shaky, Angi hasn't lost faith (yet.) What makes football even better though is DraftKings (degenerate gamblers unite) and so we looked at the bets Angi and Marris are making this weekend. Angi tossed a fiver on Caleb Williams scoring the first touchdown on Sunday (as he has something to prove) and since he is currently +1100, she would win $60 if it hits. As for Marris, he's got Matthew Stratford as his ace and thinks the Rams are scoring 40 points (even if they suck.) His $5 is on a +1300 so if he hits, he's getting $70. Obviously, if you decide to take one of these dumb bets, use Rock955 as your code because we don't want another pizza party this month.

Don't Kill Angi Weekly Recap

Mon: Angi had to rest her voice from Vegas

Choice: N/A

Result: After spending the weekend in Vegas, Angi's throat was worked out more than all those times she visited a winery or hot dog eating contest. To alleviate the vocal stress, she spent the day resting and getting ready for the rest of the week of shows. (N/A)

Tue: Angi wanted to see animals with Marris

Choice: Mickey had Angi decide to boop a lion on the nose.

Result: After being regaled with all the tales of animals that Marris saw in Zanzibar, Angi decided she too wanted to play with some fun beasts. Convincing Marris to follow her to Lincoln Park Zoo, Angi talked to the pen tenders and got them to agree to allow her to go into one of the enclosures. Since she had her fill of bears last week, Angi picked the lion cage as her place to be. Once inside the enclosure, Angi got excited and reached into her pocket to reveal a treat. The pocket full of meat was definitely what Simba wanted and though he was cautious at first, he approached her and ate it all up. He really loved his special treat and Angi decided that it was the proper moment to boop the animal on the nose. However, even though he loved the meat, Simba did not appreciate the gesture that Angi pulled. Enraged, Simba and all his lion friends pounced forward on Angi, knocking her to the ground. Before she could say a word they were upon her and tore her to shreds. Seeing this, Marris ran off because he knew better than to mess with some lions. (Dead)

Wed: Angi wanted to teach her daughter to drive in a cemetery

Choice: Laura had Angi decide to go to Mount Carmel Cemetery.

Result: After considering how she was going to allow her daughter to tear up the mean streets while driving, Angi finally settled on taking her to the cemetery. There would be barely any people for her to run over and the winding roads allowed for the ability to get a good handle on navigation. Once the pair arrived and Angi's daughter took over, she was taught all the basics like gas, pedal, brakes and blinkers. Much like any young person, Angi's daughter took to it quite easily and seemed to have a hang of things fast. Angi was actually really thrilled that she chose the cemetery and as they drove, her daughter's phone chimed. Not wanting to miss out on hot gossip, Angi's daughter checked the text and in turn, ended up taking her eyes off the road. This response led to the car barreling forward into a rather large headstone. After the smoke settled, it turned out the pair had crashed into Al Capone's grave. Enraged that his slumber had been disturbed, zombie Al Capone dug his way out of the ground and confronted the pair. "You disturbed my rest in peace!" he yelled while revealing a tommy gun which he promptly used to mow the ladies down. (Dead)

Thur: Angi wanted to bring something to the tailgate

Choice: Melissa had Angi decide to bring an ambrosia salad.

Result: After discussing tailgating one morning, Angi decided that the upcoming weekend would be the perfect time to get in on some. As Sunday rolled in, so did Angi in the Rock 95.5 truck with a box of shirts, stickers and her homemade ambrosia salad. Climbing onto the bed of the truck, Angi made sure to do her duty to promote the station by throwing out all of the shirts and stickers to the rabid tailgaters. Thrilled that they had free stuff, Angi then presented her contribution to the tailgate party. The disgusting salad was passed around but since it was so gross, it destroyed all the good will her give away had amassed. The gathered crowd began to boo and Angi knew that she was in for a world of hurt if she didn't do something to remedy the situation. Luckily, she also happened to have ten pre rolls in her purse and so she fetched those and passed them around. Within minutes, the boos turned to cheers as everyone toked up and forgot why they were so mad. In fact, they were so high that they even ate her crap salad, all the while cheering on their new lot queen. (Alive)

Fri: Angi wanted to join the circus

Choice: Kyle had Angi decide to try out tightrope walking.

Result: After talking about all the high flying fun of the UniverSoul Circus, Angi decided to try her hand at one of the things they do there. Mind you, Angi is deathly afraid of heights so when she agreed to walk the tightrope, everyone was kinda stunned. Still, Angi was a trooper and so she climbed all the way up the ladder that basically led to the sky. Once she was finally at the top and positioned on the platform, the ringmaster introduced the special guest to the audience. Attempting not to look down, Angi braced herself and was just ready to walk across the wire when someone finally noticed who she was. Excited to see "the" Angi Taylor, the fan yelled "CHAINSAW FRIDAY!!!!!!" so loud it bounced all around the arena and crashed into Angi. Freaked out, Angi lost her balance and tumbled backwards on the platform. The hostess with the mostess flew through the air with ease until she hit the ground below which caused her neck to break. (Dead)

Request Wars 4.0

Theme: Rock Songs from Video Games

Current Champion: Angi (1x)

Marris' Song Choice: "Guerilla Radio" by Rage Against the Machine

Angi's Song Choice: "Sabotage" by Beastie Boys

Winner: Marris

10 O' Clock Toast:

Toastee: Spider-Man

Marris was trolled to death this morning and he wants to die. That said, Spider-Man gets our Friday toast because he brings people together. After regaling us with his origin story, we celebrated Marris' inner/outer office non romance/romance. Angi also wanted to know why Marris never took her to the Spider-Man opera (orchestra but whatever, right?)

Show Quotes and Tidbits:

"I'm fascinated by what goes on in men's rooms." - Angi

"Are you (Marris) going to shoot webs at her?" - Angi

"It's Skankbags Taylor idea of a perfect date, doing squat thrusts in a cucumber patch." - Minn Barb

New Head Roadie Alert! Congrats Brett - Head Roadie of Nerds


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